Day 11 - Discipline -- Pandemonium

  Discipline         (Goal Number:         )                           Pandemonium            

self-control, self-command,  aplomb, practice, apprenticeship                       out of control, disorder, confusion, muddle, slipshod

AWAKE TO THE GENUINE VALUE: 

In order to achieve any goal in life, we have to discipline ourselves. As a disciplined person, you have self-control, which empowers you to take charge of your own life.You are under your own command. Of course, you take others into consideration, but you do not give them power over you, blame them, or act as if they are at fault in difficult situations. You are poised and comfortable in your own skin, You practice what you need to improve because you want to be the best you can be. You are willing to apprentice yourself to someone who can teach you what you want and need to learn.

 PARTIALLY ASLEEP TO THE GENUINE VALUE: 

Living half asleep to discipline leads you into choppy waters pf life. Sometimes you need others to focus and discipline you, for you have not developed the habit of self-discipline. You may find your lack of self-control gets you into arguments or leads to poor decisions.  You are aware you need practice in one or more areas, but you are sporadic in that practice. You do not consistently seek out mentors who can teach you what you need to know.

LIVING IN THE IMPOSTOR VALUE:

Because you have not cultivated self-control and discipline, you likely find much of your life out of control. You live with disorder, from lack of organization of possessions to the many messes you created in most areas of your life. This leads to confusion for yourself and others. You cannot be counted on to keep your word because you have so much chaos, plus what you do is not done well, it is slipshod. You tend to blame others, and you give excuses that increasingly sound farfetched.

Look at your life. Which is the most true for you?   ____ 1   _____ 2  _____ 3

What to do:

DECISION

Choose. Which do you want for yourself and your world? Which way would you like life to be? Consider how a world with pandemonium as the norm would be.  Decide today to shift to self-control and self- discipline.

FOCUSING YOUR MIND

Going for the target you have chosen

To shift in the direction of discipline, select some or all of the following and copy them in order to have them with you. Live with them. Think about them. Absorb them.

·        Self-control is a new skill I am ready to learn.

·        I  will stick with it until I succeed, for I know self-control is empowering.

    I am learning to focus my energies.

·        I choose to be a person who is in charge of myself.

·        I become more and more aware of where I am undisciplined, and I begin to correct myself.

·        I am ready to stop avoiding what needs to be done.

REINFORCING BEHAVIORS

Action steps to take to get off the log

• •        Look around your home. What clutter do you see? Each day clean up some of it and organize your space neatly. Everything has its place, so it is easy to find and use whatever you need when you are organized. Remember, in the long run it is a time saver.
• •        Look over your work. What areas do you need to organize, complete, or end? Start doing what needs to be done.
• •        Honestly survey your life, and see where you need more skills or knowledge. Explore where you can get that.
• •        Spend time each day practicing for improvement.

•             If you catch yourself blaming someone else for your mess, stop, apologize and take responsibility. It's your life, own it,

 

Day 10 - Creativity - Imitation

 Creativity         (Goal Number:         )                         Imitation

.inspiration, innovation, originality, authenticity, freshness                              impostor, drivel, inanity, mimicry, copy, repeat

 AWAKE TO THE GENUINE VALUE:

Living as a fully creative person, you are filled with inspiration and are an inspiration to others. You see possibilities for innovation in many ways and areas, not just in your main area of expertise. Originality calls to you, for you are not satisfied with how it has always been. It is important to you to be authentically you, even though it may ruffle some feathers or even cause some upset. You are drawn to authentic and creative people. You look with fresh eyes, seeing new and better, more interesting ways to do or be.

PARTIALLY ASLEEP TO THE GENJUINE VALUE:

You are sometimes hesitant to put forth your creative ideas. You do not fully embrace the creativity within you.You are somewhat timid about inspirations that come to you, carefully selecting with whom to share. You see ways to innovate some things, but ignore many possibilities. Occasionally, you dare to do or say something original, but you are not confident about it. You hide parts of yourself, feeling not always safe to be fully who you are. Life can feel stale at times.           

LIVING IN  THE IMPOSTOR  VALUE:

You  feel like an imitation, an impostor yourself. Your conversations are shallow, and tend to be about other people or simply repeats of soundbites.  Your words could be called inane or simply drivel. Your ideas and words are copies of others’ ideas you may have heard on the media or from your favorite politician or celebrity.You repeat the thoughts of others without examining them, comparing them, or considering anything new.You rarely, if ever, attempt something new and different.You are out of touch with your authentic self. Your life tends to be one note and boring.

DECISION 

Life without creativity is less than a full life. We are in the image and likeness of our Creator, so we have an inner need to express creatively; it is part of our nature. If everyone suppressed their creativity, there would be no great music, no beautiful art, no scientific breakthroughs.To the extreme lack of creativity, we would be still be in the Stone Age. Your creativity can bring joy to your life, and to others. Withholding creativity holds us all back. Risk being all you can be.

Choose. Which do you want for yourself and your world? Which way would you like life to be?

What to do:

FOCUSING YOUR MIND

Going for the target you have chosen

* To shift in the direction of creative ideas and  experiences, select some or all of the following and copy them in order to have them with you. Live with them. Think about them. Absorb them.

 *I give myself permission to begin to be more and more creative.

* I don’t have to be perfect. I simply have to begin where I am.*                      

* I welcome inspiration.

* I am allowing myself to be more and more authentic.

* I see each new day, each new hour, filled with freshness, for it has never been lived before.

REINFORCING BEHAVIORS

Action steps to take to get off the log

*Each day for a week do one creative thing. Doodle, sketch, make up a song or poem, put on music and dance freestyle around your home, write about an imaginary situation far in the past or far in the future.

*Sit outside and watch the sunset every day for several days. Notice how varied they are, and yet are all beautiful.

*Go to a museum and celebrate the great variety of human creativity. Don’t judge it, just rejoice that humans have thought all this up and made it.

*Start a journal noting creativity you see or hear. Notice when someone is just reciting talking points or unexamined ideas. Take note of authenticity or lack of it.

* Play with ideas. What if…..? What’s another way to look at…..?

*Read some biographies of creative people.

*Dare to create something from inspiration.

*Risk being ajuthentic, being you as a unique, one of a kind person. You are no longer a pale

 imitation.

Day 9 - Cooperation - Opposition

 Cooperation     (Goal Number:         )                         Opposition

teamwork, supportive, consensus, reciprocity, alignment                              self-serving, alone, protest, contradict, clash, friction

AWAKE TO THE GENUINE VALUE:  

Something inside of you knows that cooperation is a positive choice. Working together as a team is outstanding and can produce outstanding experiences along the way as well as excellent results. There is so much fun in doing projects when people support one another, coming together to reach a common goal. When people work like this, everyone is free to look at every aspect and facet openly, without preconceived notions, and arrive at a fresh solution.  You remember how empowering it is when a group reaches consensus. Everyone feels a part of it. No one is left out. Everyone is valued. Everyone wins. The times you have experienced cooperation, you have noticed that there is no attachment to positions, but people simply working together. It feels more like play than work. In such an experience, you share, they share, there are no secrets, no withholding of information. Everything is reciprocal. It is as if a well-oiled and synchronized moment has emerged. People feel in alignment.  You truly want to have more of these experiences.

PTIALLY ASLEEP TO THE GENUINE VALUE:  

You may have bought the story about competition and opposition, at least partially. You may find that you often would rather do it yourself, even when cooperation would be a better choice. Of course, there are times and moments and projects that need to be done alone, but there are also times and moments and projects that would be better served in a team atmosphere. You, however,  are distrusting of the help of others in many situations. When you do work in a team, you may hold part of yourself back for safekeeping. You may find you attract to you people who do not work well with you, making teamwork difficult. You want to make sure that you get credit for what you produce, so you have some friction and ego clashes in working with others. To the degree you believe in competition, in the sense that there have to be winners and losers in all things, you find yourself alone and overworked.

LIVING IN THE IMPOSTOR VALUE: 

You have forgotten cooperation. You experience having opposition to your ideas and you experience opposing the ideas of others with vehemence. Life seems like an uphill struggle to you. The choices that you make are not in consensus and joy but are self-serving. It’s you against the world , for you are alone. You protest wrongs and want to straighten the others out. You contradict what they say,  and they contradict you. There are clashes at home, at work, and even with strangers. Your life has a lot of friction in it. You may have told yourself that the friction creates sparks and makes life interesting and exciting. You always have ways of explaining to yourself why you are living in the impostor value system.

Look at your life. Which is the most true for you?   ____ 1   _____ 2  _____ 3

 What to do:

DECISION

To retire from the exhausting place of living in opposition, let yourself come to the decision for cooperation from the inside out. Picture what families, cities, nations, and any groupings you can think of, would be like if they constantly expressed opposition and all that this means. Imagine your life filled with clashes, friction and loneliness. Now turn the tables. Imagine life for all of these examples when cooperation is the choice. See them supportive, working as teams in alignment. Imagine yourself taking the lead to establish a new culture of cooperation in your home, job and community.

Choose. Which do you want for yourself and your world? Which way would you like life to be?

FOCUSING YOUR MIND

Going for the target you have chosen

To shift in the direction of cooperative experiences, select some or all of the following and copy them in order to have them with you. Live with them. Think about them. Absorb them.

•     I have often longed to be supportive and to have support.

•     I know I can find new ways to be cooperative. I do find the way.

•     I am immediately alert to falling out of cooperation, for I notice that reciprocity is absent. The moment I notice this, I stop, think and change direction.

•     Being part of a team is much more fun and productive than always being alone.

•     I am conscious as I select the teams in which I work, alert to those who are willing to work in consensus. I know that some people are either not ready, willing or able to learn teamwork skills. I also know that many people are ready, willing and able, and others are teachable. I find these people, and I seek them out.

•     I am willing to inspire cooperation.

•     The biggest challenges on our planet require teamwork to solve. I want to be part of the solution and not the problem.

•     I am open to learn what I need to learn in order to be able to work in harmony with others.

•     I know when teamwork is the best choice and when it is a better choice to work solo.

REINFORCING BEHAVIORS

Action steps to take to get off the log

•     Spend a few minutes thinking about times you have worked in a team where cooperation was achieved. Remember how that felt. Let your mind remember what worked and how the team was developed.

•     Select some group in your life in which you would like to develop more cooperation. Make copies of this section for each person. Call a meeting of the group. Share your idea. Give them the paper. Ask each to speak and respond. Welcome the group wisdom to develop whatever needs to happen. Be clear that whatever develops, in order for it to be cooperative, all members participate and agree. There is no preconceived outcome to be manipulated into being. This is an open-ended kind of experience.

•     Look for opportunities to work in a win/win way with people. Reciprocity is an essential part of cooperation.

•     Begin to make decisions based on consensus. In consensus, everyone involved speaks whatever they want to speak. Often there is a period of silence. The decision reached is agreeable to everyone. It is not a vote where some say “yea” and some say “nay.” It is a decision where all feel good and in alignment.

•     Find at least one way each day to be supportive.

•     Remind yourself that being “right” is not the objective. Having the highest outcome for everyone concerned IS the objective.

•     If you find your life slipping into friction, stop, take 3 deep breaths, and use one of the focusing statements, repeating it until you are focused. Now, ask yourself, “What would be the supportive thing to do here.” Listen, trust and do it.

 

Day 8 - Compassion - Insensibility

 Compassion     (Goal Number:            )            Insensibility   

considerateness, benevolence, mercy, kindness, goodwill                   unfeeling, unperceptive, unkind, heartless, 

                                                                                                            unsympathetic

AWAKE TO THE GENUINE VALUE:  

Experiencing compassion is one sure sign of being spiritually awake and alive. When you are truly awake, you are considerate of yourself and others, knowing that each one is developing and expanding. You take into consideration that the person in front of you may be having a challenging day. You look with benevolence and offer mercy. You are not quick to judge, for you realize that you cannot fully know what struggle is going on within the life and soul of another as they wrestle with the current opportunity life has presented them. You exude goodwill for everyone. This is also true for yourself. Knowing that compassion is an essential ingredient in an awakened life, you pledge to be especially careful to look art yourself and others through the gentle eyes of compassion. You remember how important it is to you. Something in you recognizes that your life will be in good shape when you totally remember compassion.

PARTIALLY ASLEEP TO THE GENUINE VALUE:  

You may find yourself dulled to compassion with perhaps lukewarm compassion for others and little for yourself. You may be selective in your doling out of compassion, having more consideration for what you deem acceptable problems or for those you judge as worthy and deserving of your good graces. You may find that compassionate responses are not your first reactions to yourself or others. You may find yourself having to work at being compassionate and have a bit of resentment for having to give it.

LIVING IN THE IMPOSTOR VALUE:

 You may be disappointed at yourself if you have fallen asleep to compassion. Relax, it wants to emerge. Life is muted when compassion is asleep or under the sway of the amnesia mist. Such an experience has an uneasy quality to it. With your merciful part shut down, you most likely pride yourself as being discriminating as you look for opportunities to be judge and jury of others. You would rather be right than have peace and joy. You are not perceptive about what is going on in deeper levels of a person or situation. The way you speak and act is often unkind, even heartless. You are not sympathetic to the plight of others, and probably not to yourself either. You find that frequently, even tiny things irritate you and give you an opportunity to pounce on yourself or others. It is not a kinder and gentler world that you live in.

Look at your life. Which is the most true for you?   ____ 1   _____ 2  _____ 3

 What to do:

DECISION

To re-establish your natural compassionate nature, you first need to decide in favor of compassion versus insensibility. It needs to be clear in your mind that compassion is the choice that reflects your true and original inner inclination, your original nature. To assist you to do this, imagine the world devoid of compassion, living in an unfeeling, unkind way. Imagine your life totally heartless and unsympathetic. Now imagine a world filled with compassion, with people having goodwill toward one another. Imagine yourself as a fully developed, compassionate person.

Choose. Which do you want for yourself and your world? Which way would you like life to be?

FOCUSING YOUR MIND

Going for the target you have chosen

To take on more of the vibration of compassion, select whichever of the following statements your heart knows would be helpful to you, copy them on a note card and carry them around with you. Stop many times and read the cards, and think about them. Open your heart to them. Feel them soaking nutrients into your parched soul. Let the renewal restore you.

•     My deepest inner self desires a compassionate world.

•     I realize that compassion is essential for any spiritually awake person.

•     I feel more and more goodwill toward myself and others.

•     The moment I slip into insensibility, something triggers me to notice and change course.

•     I enjoy finding ways to express my kindness.

•     My Higher Power is a Compassionate Higher Power.

•     I am a considerate person.

•     What a relief to finally let go of judgmental ways.

•     It is fun to look for opportunities to be truly helpful and kind.

REINFORCING BEHAVIORS

Action steps to take to get off the log

•     Find at least one kind thing to do each and every day --- and do it.

•     If someone hurts you, stop and think how you can show mercy without approving of the hurtful behavior. Rise above the situation. Be bigger than it.

•     Look back over the times you have been inconsiderate. Are there any amends your heart knows you need to make? If so, make them.

•     Keep a log of the ways you can choose, and have chosen, compassion. Look for examples in literature of how others have been compassionate. Think of possible situations in life and of how many options you have to respond. Think of a variety of compassionate responses. Practice in your mind ahead of time so that it will become more and more comfortable and natural for you to respond with compassion.

•     Several times a day, try to imagine how it would be to walk in someone else’s shoes. Ask someone questions about their life, and endeavor to understand them and how they got to where they are in life.

•     If you make what you declare to be a “mistake,” have mercy upon yourself. Put the situation in context of your whole life. Look for patterns. Look for possible lessons. Look for gifts in the situation that can set you free in new ways. Learn from this and be thankful for the lesson. Imagine how you could handle such an occurrence in a more appropriate way in the future. Practice this in your mind. Take every such experience as a guide for learning and growing and making new choices.

•     Look into the mirror and speak kindly to yourself at least once each and every day.

•     If a tragedy in the news touches your heart, send love, donate something useful, write a kind note. Become gently and kindly involved.

•     If you find your life slipping into unkindness, stop, take 3 deep breaths, and use one of the focusing statements, repeating it until you are focused. Now, ask yourself what would be the compassionate thing to do here, listen and trust.

Day 7 - Commitment - Apathy

 Commitment (Goal Number:         )                         Apathy

adopt, action,  consecration, dedication, diligence indifference, passive, wait,

                                                                                           dawdle, lethargy

AWAKE TO THE GENUINE VALUE: 

Commitment leads you to adopt the highest course of action as your life becomes consecrated to living from your own genuine values. Your actions are consistent with your values. Your dedication is exemplary. You are diligent in your efforts to remember the genuine values and to live from all that you can in any given moment. You know that effectiveness and commitment are closely related. You find a great clarity from being focused and committed. Once you give your commitment to any person or project, you can be counted upon to fulfill your promise for you diligently take action that supports your commitment. If something happens that interferes with your commitment, you re-negotiate your agreement to the satisfaction of all concerned. Your commitment leads you to work for a winning solution for everyone.

PARTIALLY ASLEEP TO THE GENUINE VALUE:  

You are committed to a few things fully, more things haphazardly, and most things not at all. It feels like too much effort to live diligently taking action and true to your commitments. Perhaps you have tried periodically and either failed or decided it was not worth the effort. You may be telling yourself that things that matter are too big and you cannot possibly make much of a difference --- so why even bother to try? You look away more than your heart wants you to.

LIVING IN THE IMPOSTOR VALUE: 

You have succumbed to the amnesia mist and are experiencing more apathy than commitment. You look at life through a dismal lens. You think nothing can be done to make things better. You look indifferently at the ways people live who are out of harmony with the genuine ways. You are not actively seeking ways to wake up and help others but are passively killing time and biding your days. You are living in the wait mode rather than in fast forward. At work and at home you dawdle, doing just as little as you can get by with doing. You shrug your shoulders and think there is little worth doing or at least little that would make a difference. You are lethargic, just getting by. You are often bored. You have resigned yourself to life being the way it is.

Look at your life. Which is the most true for you?   ____ 1   _____ 2  _____ 3

 What to do:

DECISION

This may be the moment for your decision about commitment. Imagine what the rest of your life will be like if you live in apathy. Imagine being unable or unwilling to commit to anything noble or worthy or that takes work and effort. Imagine the legacy you leave with such a life. Now imagine you live the rest of your life committed to the highest and best, to giving yourself to making this a better world. Imagine you are committed to following your deepest inner urgings. Imagine others committed to greatness and living with a dedication to life.

Choose. Which do you want for yourself and your world? Which way would you like life to be?

FOCUSING YOUR MIND

Going for the target you have chosen

To tune your mind to commitment, select one or all of the following statements to repeat numerous times to yourself. You may want to put them on note cards and carry  them with you to read many times until you begin to feel them as your own truth.

•     I am more and more comfortable with commitment.

•     Taking appropriate action is a joy.

•     What and who are worthy of my commitment are easier and easier for me to discern.

•     I really enjoy being dedicated to the things that make the center of my being sing.

•     I can hardly imagine that I was once apathetic.

•     As a committed person, I feel so effective. I AM so effective!

•     I enjoy having a dedicated focus in my life.

•     I am an active part of an awakening, improving, more wonderful world.

•     I am committed to greatness --- mine and other’s!

REINFORCING BEHAVIORS

Action steps to take to get off the log

•     Contemplate the things that used to matter a lot to you when you were younger. Write a list. Consider which ones still mean a lot to you. Pick at least one and do something positive in support of it.

•     Knowing that your life can be a model of how the highest human life can be, involve yourself in a project that you totally believe in and model loving commitment.

•     Find a need, gather a team, create a solution and do something wonderful together to fill that need.

•     Look at how you spend your time. Keep a log for a week. Cut down on the time spent on things you cannot feel committed about and expand the time spent on the things for which you feel commitment.

•     Select your most important values and read them daily, affirming commitment to them.

•     What one area, if you would work on it with dedication would most positively change your life? Make a plan to work on that area.

•     Each day for a week write in your journal about the imprisoned greatness waiting to express through you.

•     Take a walk and repeat, for various things that you see as you look around you: I am focused. I am focused as I look at this ______.

•     Write two eulogies for your funeral. One eulogy is from the perspective of the rest of your life lived in apathy, while the other is if you live the rest of your life committed to be all you can be.

•     If you find your life slipping into apathy, stop, take 3 deep breaths, and use one of the focusing statements, repeating it until you are focused. Now, ask yourself what would be the highest thing to do her, listen, trust and act.

Reflecting Day

On the 7th day of our values journey together, let's take a day of reflection.

Please think about the first six values, especially the one you most dearly find important in your life, plus the one you like the least, 

What about them draws you or repels you?

What does that tell you about yourself?

How can being more awake to them be helpful to your life?

I want to reiterate that I absolutely know you came to this planet, this time, this place on purpose with a purpose, and furthermore, it is important for each of us to wake up and live that purpose. 

It is my guidance that by considering these 40 values, we can be more able and empowered to do just that.

We are all one of a kind masterpieces, unique, precious, and sacred.We only are able to live our purpose in our own unique way. No one else can be you.

Thank you for joining me on this adventure.

Day 6 - Affiliation - Separation

 Affiliation        (Goal Number:         )             Separation

community, involvement, bonding, companionship                withdrawal, aloofness, standoffishness, unsocialbleness

AWAKE TO THE GENUINE VALUE: 

When you are clear about affiliation, you remember that you are a part of the community of humanity, one human family. You are aware that at various levels, all life is involved with each another. At both subtle and obvious levels all life on earth shares the same air and water and future. All people share similar situations. It is fun for you to cheer for  others as they  triumph over life’s challenges, and you like to reach out a helping hand. Involvement reflects your true nature. You experience the high honor it is to be part of the process of life. You know that we all share this journey called life. The more you share, the more alive you feel and the more bonded you are to others. When you stop for just a few moments of reflection, you  realize we understand each other at deep levels. In so many ways, we are all one. Camaraderie is an exquisite gift that you cherish. As you  look upon the community of life on earth, you see how intricately you are woven into all of it.

PARTIALLY ASLEEP TO THE GENUINE VALUE: 

You may feel alienated from other people or other forms of life on earth part of the time. Perhaps you allow some into your heart of hearts, reserving that space for a select few. Perhaps you never fully open yourself to be involved completely. You may feel separate part of the time, but putting up a good front, few others realize how apart you feel inside. You can be charming on the outside, but deeply uncomfortable on the inside. It only marginally bothers you when difficult things happen to others. You only feel like reaching out to those within your closed circle.

LIVING IN THE IMPOSTOR VALUE: 

You feel separate much of the time with most if not all people. You think you are the only one or one of few who are going through whatever it is that are going through. You have withdrawn from the larger community. You may have even withdraws from all others. You have put up a protective barrier that is called aloofness. It is very frightening to live cut off from companionship with your community, so it is no wonder you have a standoffish way about you. You are not sociable, and being in social groups may evoke terror in you. You may have told yourself that you have to live this way. Your reasons include things like: it is not safe to let others in; there are many dangerous people out there; you have to watch your back, everyone knows that; you can only trust your friends, but it’s hard to know who they are; etc.

Look at your life. Which is the most true for you?   ____ 1   _____ 2  _____ 3

What to do:

DECISION

In order to make a shift, it is essential to decide between your options, consciously and with full consent. Begin by closing your eyes and visualizing what life for you would be like if you lived in total separation for the rest of your life. Let yourself come into full understanding. Expand your mental picturing now to see what the world would be like if everyone lived in total aloofness.

Now visualize what life for you would be like if you lived with affiliation and community as your guides. Let yourself come into full understanding. Expand your mental picturing now to see what the world would be like if everyone lived in an involved way.

Choose. Which do you want for yourself and your world? Which way would you like life to be?

FOCUSING YOUR MIND

Going for the target you have chosen

In order to achieve the things your inner self longs to achieve, some refocusing of your mind will be helpful. Begin by redefining yourself. Select one or more of the following statements to repeat with great frequency in order to develop your new mindset. Choose the statements according to your conscious listening to your intuition. Copy your choices on 3x5 cards to keep with you and use during your day.

•     I am willing to have the complete fun that can only come with deep bonding with others.

•     Camaraderie sounds more and more desirable to me.

•     I am ready and willing to be part of a community of people connected at the deepest levels.

•     I am no longer willing to withdraw and miss the greatest moments of life.

•     The moment I sense any pulling back, I will find in myself the perfect idea to bring my involvement into the present moment.

•     Every day I become more and more comfortable with living in harmony with others.

•     I find myself becoming a more and more positively involved person.

•     I admire those who are part of a community.

•     I think it is possible to live in harmony with all peoples.

REINFORCING BEHAVIORS

Action steps to take to get off the log

•     Think of all of the people in your life with love. Think of something good about each one.

•     Make a list of the people you personally know that you admire the most. What about them do you admire? Invite them all to a party, dinner, picnic, or some such event. Give yourself permission to really enjoy being with people you admire.

•     Make a list of the people in the world you admire the most. What about them do you admire? Write them a note acknowledging them for their admirable qualities.

•     Make a list of the people with whom you feel at odds. Think about at least one positive thing about each one (everyone is someone’s favorite person!) Ask yourself how you could create a more positive relationship with them.

•     Look for ways to connect with people.

•     With friends and family, open up a little more than you ever have. Share your heart.

•     Find one or more ways each day to be helpful to others.

•     If you need something, share your need and be open to let others give to you.

•     Clip from magazines and newspapers examples of people caring. Perhaps start a caring scrapbook to look over from time to time.

•     If you find your life slipping into aloofness, stop, take 3 deep breaths, and use one of the focusing statements, repeating it until you are focused again. Now, ask yourself what would be the highest and most caring thing  to do here, listen, trust and take action.