Affection (Goal Number: ) Violence
liking,
caring, kindness, fondness, favor hate, heartlessness, hostility,
ruthlessness, savagery
AWAKE
TO THE GENUINE VALUE:
When you are awake to affection, you care for yourself
and others with a positive attitude and affection. You remember that each
person on this planet is part of the great oneness of humanity, all coming from
the same Divine Parent. You recall that actually we are each other's sisters and
brothers. In your natural state, you like yourself and others. Your affection manifests as caring and kindness towards yourself and others. No one is left out of
the circle. You want good for each and every person. You constantly look for
ways to show your kindness. There is no spot in your heart where you withhold
the desire for goodness for everyone. You care about even those people who have
forgotten who they are and behave in backward or disharmonious ways. You are
determined that you will not be controlled by the behavior of others, that your
kindness is who you are.
PARTIALLY
ASLEEP TO THE GENUINE VALUE:
You have shut off some of your affection for
yourself and for others. Your tenderness and caring are slowed down and cloudy.
You find it hard to give or receive encouraging words and hugs except with
those most close to you. You shy away from some people, suspecting their
motives. You feel unsafe with certain people. You think that affection and
caring have to be doled out carefully for they make you vulnerable to others.
You want to be sure you are not in anyone else’s debt, so you are reserved in
reaching out to people. You find it hard to give yourself affection. You may
worry about being too kind to yourself, not wanting to appear egotistic.
LIVING
IN THE IMPOSTOR VALUE:
You have forgotten affection and live one of the hardest
kinds of lives. You say things to yourself that are demeaning and devoid of
affection. You say unkind things to others also. Your life has violence in it.
You may think that violence is entertaining. You go to hurtful programs, watch
violent movies, listen to violent music and expect to have violence perpetrated
upon you. You may have hate in your heart for someone or some group. You have
elaborate excuses that make heartlessness seem all right in your eyes, at least in
certain cases. Some people in certain circumstances deserve violence, you
think. You find yourself hostile more and more of the time. You are becoming
desensitized to violence. Savagery seems less and less unusual and less and
less wrong. Your heartlessness may extend to all kinds of life, humans,
animals, plants, and Mother Earth Herself. In some cases, your violence and
condoning of violence may be masquerading and seem subtle. Look carefully.
Look
at your life. Which is the most true for you?
____ 1 _____ 2 _____ 3
What to do:
DECISION
In
order to make a shift, it is essential to decide between your options,
consciously and with full consent. Begin by closing your eyes and visualizing
what life for you would be like if you lived in total violence for the rest of
your life. Let yourself come into full understanding. Expand your mental
picturing now to see what the world would be like if everyone lived in total
heartlessness.
Now
visualize what life for you would be like if you lived with affection and
kindness as your guides. Let yourself come into full understanding. Expand your
mental picturing now to see what the world would be like if everyone lived in a
caring and kind way.
Choose.
Which do you want for yourself and your world? Which way would you like life to
be?
FOCUSING
YOUR MIND
Going
for the target you have chosen
In
order to achieve the things your inner self longs to achieve, some refocusing
of your mind will be helpful. Begin by redefining yourself. Select one or more
of the following statements to repeat with great frequency in order to develop
your new mindset. Choose the statements according to your conscious listening
to your intuition. Copy your choices on 3x5 cards to keep with you and use
during your day.
• I am willing to be affectionate.
• I can separate affection and kindness from
sex, so that I can be affectionate and kind without sexual agenda.
• I am willing to learn to receive and give
appropriate affection and kindness.
• I no longer am willing to have any violence
in my life.
• The moment I sense any hostility, I find in
myself the perfect idea to bring
kindness into the moment.
• Every day I become more and more
comfortable with affection.
• I find myself becoming a more and more
caring person.
• I admire those who are kind and caring of
themselves and others.
• I am genuinely fond of myself.
• I find things I can be fond of in each and
every person I meet.
• I am a truly caring and kind person.
REINFORCING BEHAVIORS
Action steps to take to get off the log
• Look in the mirror and tell yourself that
you are a good person and you care about yourself. Spend five minutes every
morning and evening in this way.
• Give extra hugs to your loved ones today.
• Find one or more new kind and caring things
to do each day.
• As you move about your life and see other
people, some of whom you do not know, say to yourself, “I only want good for
these people.”
• Ask someone you know for a hug.
• Write a caring note to someone you know.
Mail it. Now write a caring note to someone you have only heard or read about
and mail that too.
• Find books, music, movies, games, etc. that
reinforce caring and kind behavior. Refuse to read books, listen to music, go
to movies or play games that glorify violence or hostility in any way.
• Find a program in your community that cares
and participate in it.
• If you find your life slipping into
hostility, stop, take 3 deep breaths, and use one of the focusing statements,
repeating it until you are focused again. Now, ask yourself what would be the
affectionate, caring thing to do here, listen, trust and take action.
