It's All About Now

 This morning I awoke with insights flooding my thoughts. One of the flows is about that illusive concept of the now. As many have said, including me, now is all we have, the only moment we can live and breathe and tnink and learn and love and be. The past is written and gone. The future is only there in our imaginations. This moment is it. 

All else is temporary blips in so many ways. I've been mourning all of my treasres stolen from me by my duplicitous husband. But it was all on temporary loan. When I leave the planet it all stays here. I've mourned my things out and about the planet without their stories. Now they are just interesting things adrift from their meaning. 

For examole - The painting I did in a fit of inspiration after my previous husband died; the painting that was about souls going back and forth from the spiritual realm to here; the painting that I later discovered was also a vision to Suzuki so that his description of his vision was as if he were looking at my painting; yes that painting is now just a pretty yellow painting sonewhere without me and without its meaning. Everything I had also had a story. I grieve for that.

 And then I saw my many family antiques. I knew a tiny bit about their stories. The little rocking chair my grandfather bought my mother when she was born, or the hand made braclet my other grandfather had made for my grandmother with their initials on either side, their pictures inside,  and the dent from my father's first tooth on the heart, etc.  

But each item had a rich story to the people who first had them in their lives, stories now lost. In fact, the vast, vast majority of the stories of people now gone are lost, even their very existence, except for a tiny few of the billions upon billions who have graced this planet, are unknown. Nobody even knows they were here, let alone their joys and sorrows, their accomplishments and failures. 

I realized this morning that my things, everyone's things, were always going to go without the story about them, for we were always going to leave this planet one day. Our very existence will be forgotten somewhere in the passing of time.

Yet I also saw that all we do is important, and we will be asked about it all, when we drop our bodies and our souls go forth.  We will not be asked about our things. We will be asked about our soul development and participation. Did we love? Did we forgive? Were we generoius? What did we do with the gift of life?

So we come full circle back to the now. Each moment of now we have some control over, at least over our input into it. Each moment we can choose love over hate or judgementalness. Each now we can choose forgiveness over resentment. Each moment we can choose generosity over selfishness or stinginess, Just as we can only breathe in this moment for this moment (we cannot breathe for any other time), we can choose to be lights, to shine our Christ nature, to be more than we knew we could be, now and then now and then the next now. We can take charge of who we are one moment at a time.

I know that is what really matters. I know that is what we will be asked about. I know each and every person is a sacred life, and is called to live each sacred moment in the highest and most lght-filled way possible. Life on earth is both a challenge and a gift. Life on earth is a school to develop our spiritual muscle, so to speak, and to rise up and be the light. I urge you to turn your light on the bright setting.

A Thought from Socrates

... a man who is good for anything ought not to calculate the chance of living or dying; he ought only to consider whether in doing anything he is doing right or wrong — acting the part of a good man [woman] or of a bad. -- Socrates during his trial

He wrapped up ideal human behavior in these few words, words that travel across the many centuries to us today and to countless others along the way.

 He places it in our hands to judge ourselves, to examine our choices moment by moment. 

As I look around, I sadly see a significant number of people who do not ask this of themselves. Or it seems highly unlikely they do by the results in their lives and the prob!ems we see and hear about daily.

To use Shakespeare's metaphor, all the world is a stage, we ask Socrates' question - what part are we playing? Are we playing a good part or a bad part? Are we a hero or a villain? Are we a bystander? Do we show courage and faith? 

Ask yourself Socrates' question, and answer honestly.

Inner Heart's Experience of God

 No man knoweth the Father but the Son." The passage as it stands reported in Matthew may be colored by later theology, but there is a nucleus of absolute truth hidden in the saying. There is no other way to know God but this way of inner love-experience. Only a son can know a Father. Only one who has trodden the wine-press in anguish and pain, and through it all has felt the enfolding love of an Abba-father really knows. Mysticism has its pitfalls and its limitations, but this much is sound and true, that the way to know God is to have inner heart's experience of Him, like the experience of the Son. --- Rufus Jones, "The Inner Life"

For me, the moments of direct experience of God are the true treasures of my life. Knowing we are loved, knowing that if we listen we will be guided, knowing we are not alone, all these and more make all of the difference.

As you know, I have trodden the wine press of anguish for a month and a half now, as well as other times in my past. Through it all, God has been with me, protecting me and keeping me from free falling into a deep hole, and whispering softly to me. Perhaps the anguish is burning away more dross, so my soul will be freer to express. 

I know there is more for me to do here on earth. At this moment it is not clear to me exactly what that is. That is fine, for I have some healing to do, some reassembling the shards of my heart and mind. There is still disorientation. It is softening. I know I will come out of this potholed valley and be stronger and clearer. As a mentor long ago told me, a knife has to be tempered in the fire be able to be a useful tool, and you must be tempered by the fires of life in order to be a more useful tool in the Hand of God.

You too may have gone through anguish. I pray you hear what I share from my heart to yours. 

God bless you dear spiritual friend.

The Naked Now

 In pondering the state of my life now, I had some insights this morning I want to share with you.

Spiritual advice has long been to live in the now, the only moment we actually have, the only moment we can breathe, the only moment we have to live. 

Gilbert has inadvertently given me that gift. He has stripped away from me my past and all of the mementos of it. He has caused me to change my views of the past, redefining and releasing. He has stripped me of my dreams for the future. None of the ones we dreamed together are possible now. It is all drifting away from me. Vivid memories and dreams are fading.

So I now stand in the naked now. I stand with no past and no future so to speak. Here in this unique moment in time, stripped of what was and what could have been, I am just here.

So now I come to God unencumbered, as I say, Take my hand Precious Lord, lead me on as You would. Thy will be done. Amen, Amen and Amen!

What Have We Created?

 The "modern" age has done a number of things, especially to the mindset of people and to our ways of living.

We moved off farms and ranches in large numbers to live in asphalt and concrete jungles. Many people have never wandered among the trees, or dangled their feet in a creek, or had any meaningful experience of nature.

We moved from being artisans and conservers of lovely things to being consumers.

We moved into the fallacy of science that says we are in control and can do and be whatever we want. Many no longer believed in God or in the power of nature, but in our own powers, at least the powers of the technology people. We moved into hubris. We can change the climate. We can move off the planet. We can change our sexes, We can do whatever we want. The only limits are ones we put on ourselves.

Without religion, philosophy, and wisdom, we created a dystopia. We have a large number of people on drugs to change their mental state, to numb themselves or kill themselves. We have a frenzy to shop and shop, to get and get. We have disconnected from the wisdom of the ages, and are in many ways adrift in less than meaningful lives.

It seems to me we need to think through what we have done. Is it a good thing for us, for others? What can we do about it? As humans, we have the potential in every moment to think again, start again, begin again, change direction, be more.

I believe firmly that the spark of the Divine resides in each person. Let us water it. Walk in nature. Read wise ones. Think, consider, debate with yourself. Think some more. This day has not been liv ed before, make it a great one.

Resonate With What?

 It seems to me that what we are called to be in resonance with is the Higher Power/God/Divine Presence. It rings throughout the universe with the Call.

How do we move in relationship to The More so that we resonate in harmony with It?

The secret word is "Love." The great traditions all speak of "Love." We wash away all darkness, reentments, ill will, angers, attacks, dividing into "in" or "out" groups, etc. We become walking, talking, beingness of LOVE. We Love because that is who we are. Our Love is not contingent on anything outside. That is, it is not dependent on how others act or speak. It as much a part of us as breathing itself. It is who we are, what we do.

The closer we get to this aspirational goal, the more we resonate with The One. The farther we are away, the less we resonate. We can get so far away, there is only tiny resonance and a flatness, a life only drearily lived, not even approaching the Divine Purpose for coming here.

If our goal is actually spiritual awakening, I suggest we clean off the darkness and move more and more each day into  love, then Love, and then  LOVE!

New Reality

 Over the course of our earthly lives, we shift realities numerous times.  We were once inhabitants of a liquid world in a womb with sounds muffled and limited light. We were once totally dependent little beings, needing the giants around us to do everything for us. We once had no language but crying and waving our limbs. We gained language little by little, and mobility, and our world became bigger. We went to school, and its new batches of reality opened to us. On and on we went, moving from a more limited reality to a bigger one, repeatedly. 

Mostly our reality shifts were somewhat gradual. We had choices. We could embrace them, resist them, run from them, try to change them. We could be adventurous, angry, happy, sad about it all.

I stand at a new place for me. I have an abrupt reality shift of unusual proportions. 

Reality 1: Up until April 9. 2025, 9 a.m., Married to my soulmate who loved me, facing challenges together, trusting our oneness, both filled with Christian faith, who sadly became terminally ill and died of it, organ failure, and a massive heart attack. 

Reality 2: Beginning April 9, 2025, 9:30 a.m., Married to a psychopathic con man who had no feelings or remorse, who stole all of my treasures, money, inheritance, never loved me or anyone, was not spiritual, and died a horrible death.

I seem to have psychological whiplash. 

I have been informed by a retired police officer friend that this is not all that uncommon. So I share so that you know you are not alone. Others have the same climb back to wholeness as I do. Others have been bamboozled by a slick pro. Others have had their hearts, their dreams, their lives trampled. 

Reality will right itself. There will be peace again. Healing will happen. And a door will open to a new chapter. We will walk through that door a lot wiser and stronger. We fell, and yet we rise.